And the award goes to . . .

I recently read a list of "cool" LDS women and found myself pretty annoyed by the time I got to number 100. Don't mistake, these women are amazing. They are authors, artists, journalists, athletes, musicians, leaders, professors, politicians, philanthropists, and executives. One in particular stood out to me: Jane Clayson Johnson, journalist and author of I Am a Mother! I felt very validated in my stay-at-home mommyness when I read her book, but I found myself crying, "Traitor!" when I saw her "just a mom" face on the cool kids list (as if she had a say in the matter). You know who else made the list? A soap opera actress. I highly doubt she is cooler than I am. Or more modest.

I realized I was annoyed for the sake of all moms who rarely get recognition or praise in their home-bound jobs. We're repeatedly told that motherhood is the noblest of all callings, that no work can compensate for failure in the home, that nothing can adequately substitute the influence of a mother, and yet there's not a single stay-at-home mom (SAHM) on that cool list. I get it, really I do. World-wide audience. And honestly, I'd wager that most of the women on the list who are also mothers do a much better job of mothering than I do; those types of women have a knack for perfection that we average Flo Shmoes don't grasp.

But I think it would be a lot easier to stay "cool" if you were being recognized for your coolness. These women get awards, medals, publications, fan mail, colleague approval, and media recognition. My approval rating drops every time my kids see what I made for dinner. I do get hugs and kisses . . . when I beg for them. Sometimes I have to hold my son hostage until I've had my fill of validation, even though he's kicking and screaming to break free. And sometimes I bring actual medals home from my running hobby--you know the finisher medal they hand out to everybody--but even then my sense of accomplishment is dashed: my son once responded to my 13th place out of hundreds finish with, "So, you lost?" Talk about a let-down. If I was getting mommy fan mail on a daily basis, you'd better believe I would step up my game.

So I decided to make a 100 Cool Stay-at-home Moms list of my own. And then I realized the potentially disastrous consequences of leaving somebody out (I'm envisioning tears, suicide, hate mail), and scratched the list. I wish I could keep it on here--I think some people might be surprised to see that I had thought of them even though we aren't best buddies. Wouldn't it make you feel awesome to see your name on a random acquaintance's list of cool moms?

So if you're reading this, SAHM, I hope you know that I think you're great and hope that you leave with renewed vigor to keep to the daily grind. I wish someone was giving you a prestigious award every time you got the laundry completely done.

Just remember that I'm showering you with praises for it.

(If you really need a physical affirmation, stop by and I'll give you one of my loser race medals.)